Bash: A Tale of Serving Heroes (1)

I’ve decided to try putting up some of the little things I’m working on, since I seem to be unable to conjure up blog topics every week.

“Thank you for calling Bash, my name is Alexander, how can I help you?”
“I am Sir Harold of Misra and my sword isn’t working.”
“Ok Sir Harold, how isn’t your sword working?”
“It’s just not working.”
“Is it not cutting? Is it a flaming sword?”
“No, it’s not a flaming sword. And yes it still cuts fine.”
“Ok sir, so how is the sword not working?”
“If I knew I wouldn’t be calling you.”
“RRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH”
“Sir, is that a dragon?”
“Yes, I’m trying to use this stupid ice sword on this dragon, but it’s not freezing it.”
“Sir did you say it’s an ice sword?”
“Yes, I just said that.”
“And it’s not freezing the dragon?”
“Yes, I said that too.”
“Sir, ice dragons can’t be frozen with our ice swords.”
“Then what good are they!?” Continue reading

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Read It! – The Last Policeman

Post-apocalyptia has become almost the default setting for fiction lately.  Nuclear bombs come, wipe out all life, and then every story is about a guy, or gal, trying to knit jaw bones together to murder their way back to civilization.  Or something about teens being subjected to weird murderous trials to make serums.  I don’t know, it doesn’t always make sense.  Maybe a story about life after the apocalypse could not be about giant bombs or viruses gone crazy?  What about a world that just doesn’t care because they all know it’s going to be over anyway?  A sort of, pre-pacolypse maybe?  I bet there’s a great series of detective stories set in that sort of setting!

Spoiler warning: there totes is.

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Xenogears

For those who recognize my title, congrats!  I can hear your mixture of euphoria and dread from here.  But nevertheless, I’m here to tell you about one of my favorite games, warts and all.  So join me on my little trip back to 90s jRPGs!

Xenogears_box

Man, I can hear the music now.

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Vastness

Space is really cool.

Really, it’s super cool.  It’s actually one of my favorite “settings.”  It has pretty much all the elements of a good setting and really gives you room to tell a great story.  I’ll tell you why it’s in quotes though, since it takes a bit of talking. Continue reading

Unrelenting Praise

When you read the title to this post, what do you think of?  Lots of praise, heaped in great, wondrous piles upon a worthy item/person?  Each piece lovingly given by those who were personally touched the greatness of the recipient?  Something so wonderful that it enriches the lives of everyone who comes into contact with it?

Or are you like me, and see something that people praise because…people praise it?

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The Tick

When you think of mighty superheroes, what do you think of?  Rippling muscles, spandex and a booming voice bellowing a catchphrase?  Yeah, that’s about what I think of too.  Except my superhero isn’t shouting “up, up and away” or “it’s clobbering time” or even “here I come to say the day.”

He comes in shouting “SPOOOOOOOOOOOON” Continue reading

Slaughterhouse Five

I really wanted to do Shadow of the Colossus.  I really did.

But I decided we’d had a lot of games lately, so maybe it was time to talk about a book.  And why Slaughter House Five?

Because it’s an awesome story about a man being taken by aliens and coming loose from time.

So it goes. Continue reading